Friday the 13

This is a special time for me.

A day when i can let the chaotic energies flow through me and revel in their emotional rapturous glory.

A time where it matters not what is fact, fiction, truth or lies.

All that matters is instinct and emotion.

No politics today.

This is my time to be powerful.

My time to bask in the glow of others misfortune as karma balances out within me.

A time to spread my tear stained wings and tower over the pathetic excuses of humanity we have today.

A world where people live in denail fear and fakery is mine to destroy and to leave in its wake a place where mankind is not afraid to be honest, to show their feelings.

Not afraid to become angry at someone or to love someone unconditionally.

Not afraid for change.

A world of adaptability.

So let the chaotic powers reside witghin their rightful master, and allow the powerup from ordinary to extraordinary as i prove once again that nothing can stop me and nothing can overpower the sanctity of emotional instinct.

Manta, come to me and let us combine to create the embodiment of darkshock; a mirror into the true colors of this world. A shadow to allow true light to shine forth. A world where I am Alwaysthebigbrother no more.

People view jealousy as a bad thing. I know because I was one of them.

Then I began to think.

Jealousy isn't a crime. It's a tool.

Jealousy fuels rage, which in situations that impact my life, can be a benefit.

As I type, I let the darnkess in my soul well up, compounding upon my rage, building it. My jelaousy swirls like a tempest.

The wings of truth and justice that lie upon my back warp and twist into demon's wings, filled with fire and hate.

Hate for those who hurt me.

Hate for those who spurn me.

Hate to those who don't know.

Hate to myself for not letting go.

The beast is unleashed, but under the guise of a friend.

Now to manipulate to my own selfish end.

Why do I get Jealous.

I hate what jealous people do, I hate what jealous people act like.

Jealousy in and of itself is caused by what seems to me to be petty reasons.

So the question I ask is why?

Why do I get Jealous?

Why does the power embrace me?

Why is it that as it is bubbling up inside of me I don't fear and destroy, I accept and inspire?

Why am I addicted to its power?

What causes me to feel this way?

What causes me to do Dark desires, yet hate them in the end?

Why do I hurt?

Why...?

Thats it. I've hurt the one I care deeply for. I can't do this.

I can't.

I'm pierced, and cannot move the shaft.

I can't.

I wish i could say good bye.

I can't.

I want to give up.

I won't.

I will not hurt whom I love anymore.

Never more.

I feel old.

Drained.

I regret what I do, but not how I do it.

Im sorry.

I am.

I.

Love.